Do you feel frustrated after years of covering your gray hair only to find it increasingly unsatisfactory? You may be diligently coloring your roots to hide visible white strands, yet somehow the roots keep showing faster and faster, and the color keeps getting darker. This can be disappointing, especially when you believe you are taking all the right steps in your hair care routine, but the results do not meet your expectations.
You may also be at a stage where you have become preoccupied with minor facial features, mistakenly believing you are the source of aging. In reality, it is the change in your hair that accentuates imperfections in your face, bringing attention to facial features that previously were softened. The loss of your once beautiful hair reveals a combination of ”flaws” in your facial structure, face shape and skin tone.
There are 4 phases of in which you can determine how soon you show “signs of aging.” These phases can last anywhere from six months to ten years, and only you can control or accelerate this process.
Phase 1 – Overlapping Color
Applying color to the hair roots every 2 to 3 weeks (2 to 3 millimeters of regrowth) leads to overlapping color, causing the hair to darken progressively with each application. This cycle results in more visible gray hair, harsher color lines, and the need for more frequent visits to the salon. With frequent coloring, a stylist cannot just color the new growth without overlapping the previously colored hair. Even when using darker blonde or light blonde shades to achieve full gray coverage, the process will result in slightly darkening the existing hair color. This situation represents the first phase that some may find themselves trapped in.
Phase 2 - Lightening & Hair Damage
To achieve a soft, “blended hair effect” and soften hard lines, many in Phase 1 attempt highlights, which can lead to undesirable orange/warm tones instead of beige, particularly for those with dark hair. Lightening dark hair usually reveals strong orange undertones. In many cases, although you somewhat neutralize the orange undertone, it starts to reappear after a few washes. This issue is also common among individuals seeking high blonde colors or bleached roots.
When faced with an orange/warm tone in hair color, stylists typically have two approaches:
The first option is to lighten the hair significantly, which may exceed what the hair can withstand, in an attempt to eliminate any orange/warm tones. However, this method often leads to a damaging phase (Phase 2), as excessive lightening will harm the hair.
The second option is to opt for a safer route and refrain from adequately lightening the hair; the orange tones will persist, and this is common especially after many years of being in Phase 1. To mitigate these warm tones, the stylist may apply an ashier color to neutralize the orange. While this can balance out the color somewhat, due to the orange strands returning to a more neutral color, it is still surrounded by dark hair; the overall appearance of the hair shifts back to dark. Inadvertently, this pushes the hair back into the initial Phase 1. Thus, the continuous interplay over time between these two options can lead to repeat issues with hair color and damage. Hair begins to feel dry and sensitive to brushing.
Phase 3 – Over Styling Hair & “Clutter Products”
Phase 3 marks the onset of significant hair breakage and fall. During this phase, individuals begin to notice the presence of fragile hair scattered throughout. The hair becomes prone to snapping and breaking, resulting in numerous short strands distributed across the scalp. This condition is characterized by a transition where the hair becomes puffy and frizzy on the roots and thin with wispy ends to eventually having no ends as the hair continues to deteriorate.
When shifting between phases, it is important to understand that this does not signify progress; rather, it indicates being trapped within three phases. This situation instills a fear of hair coloring, yet the desire to conceal gray hair remains strong. In this phase, individuals over-style their hair to maintain an appearance of beautiful and healthy hair, but this approach exacerbates the issue. Continuous styling to appear presentable leads to increasing dryness and damage, weakening the hair further.
Consequently, the hair becomes shorter and frizzier and unmanageable without product assistance, leading to daily blow-drying to combat frizz and puffiness. Despite using a flat iron for smoothing, hair often appears lifeless and lacks shine, with some strands reflecting a green hue in specific lighting. Hair is unmanageable, and individuals will bounce between multiple styling products, treatments and styling tools.
Phase 4 – Decision Time
The fear of coloring sets in, but there is still a need to cover gray. In this phase, one is forced to make a decision and to break away from repeating their hair habits that have led to phase 4. This can be a difficult choice to make as many have been stuck for many years in this situational habit without realizing it. The hair now, our most crucial asset, is gone and can take 3 to 10 years to restore, and is influenced by one's health and follicle condition.
This is where one feels frustrated that everything they have tried or done is not working. Many individuals become frustrated with their hair's appearance and start to focus on how they look, forgetting that hair loss and damage can significantly affect their perceived age. Their beautiful and elegant hair that used to hide a big percentage of their minor “imperfections” is no longer there and now appear pronounced.
Finding Solutions
No size fits all. Every individual may require a different approach dependent on their past hair coloring habits that got them here, as well as their hair care history. Many years of being stuck on 1 or in-between all 3 phases play a big part too. You can inform your stylist about your new journey and how they can help you transition to healthier hair and or other options regarding coloring your hair again when it is healthy.
A general principle is recommended: Minimizing actions and frequency such as coloring hi-lift blondes, touching up roots, covering gray 100%, and styling leads to healthier hair. Adopting a simple and low-maintenance strategy, diet or product/s is essential for achieving beautiful hair. The less you do, the better, always think less, and the better your hair will be.
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